Friday, 7 November 2008

Night bus to Vang Viang

Here we go again. A 6 hour journey by rickety bus, supposedly a VIP coach with aircon. Well, the windows were open, so by Laos standards it had aircon.

The scenery was stunning, and the weather changed with every valley we sank into, every mountain we climbed. The locals don't seem to enjoy travelling along Laos's bumpy, potholed roads. Even when it was raining in, I had to keep the window open to avoid the smell of vomit. The conductor was walking around handing out plastic bags as people emptied the contents of their stomachs around us (not literally that close). He asked us if we'd like one, and I cheerfully replied with a grin "No ta, but do you have any beer?"

So I was soaked, and drowning out the gurgles and splashing noises with my own music. The driver seemed intent on making us listen to his, which was dreadful to say the least. I was pleased to get a brief respite when we stopped at a ramshackle cafe about halfway. Though less pleased when I'd been ripped off by the old lady for a packet of pringles about 5 years out of date, which tasted like they'd been stored near strong detergent. I asked to exchange or get my money back, but she just laughed. The horrible old witch. I hope her shack falls down in the wind.

The seaweed crisps made up for it, though. And the piss stop the driver let us have later on, too. Feeling the breeze on the old Family Jewels as you trickle urine down a mountainside and look out over eternal jungle is a sensation not to be missed...

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